Student Spotlight: Vanessa Rafanan

“I'm the kind of person who believes you can have your cake and eat it too!” shared Vanessa Rafanan, a student in the Wright Institute’s Clinical Psychology Program. “I would encourage folks to pursue and explore all of their interests because it's so hard to know early on what’s for you and what's not.” During her time at the Wright Institute, Vanessa has explored a wide variety of interests, both in and out of the classroom, as she prepares for her future.

Vanessa grew up in Porterville, California, a small town in the Central Valley that she described as “so small you could drive past it and not even realize.” Although Vanessa is her parents’ only child, she felt fortunate to live near many family members who were like siblings to her growing up. She attended public schools and, as is typical in a small town, many of her classmates were the same from kindergarten through high school. “There was definitely a culture of working really hard so that you could leave,” she admitted, “but I feel really fortunate that I grew up with such a great, wonderful group of people that I still keep in touch with.” Vanessa has fond memories of her classmates helping one another study, with everyone bringing different skills to the table.

For her undergraduate studies, Vanessa attended the University of California in Merced, California. “I think a lot of its appeal for me was that it was a smaller, newer school and I had an opportunity to have closer relationships with my professors and TAs,” she reflected. “I also had the opportunity to be a pioneer in a lot of different ways and I found that I'm drawn to experiences where I kind of get to be at the forefront of building programs and starting traditions.” The study of cognitive science was appealing to Vanessa primarily due to its multidisciplinary nature. “I was really torn between focusing on the biology of the human brain and focusing on these more abstract concepts of the human mind,” she explained. “I discovered that cognitive science combines all of those things, and I really liked that.” Vanessa graduated with her Bachelor of Science in cognitive science in 2015.

While Vanessa was a student at UC Merced, she spent three years as the Lead Peer Mentor in their newly-established Peer Mentor Program. “I know how difficult and even scary it can be to ask for help,” she admitted. “There's a lot less comfort in more evaluative relationships, like with your professor or a class advisor, and I liked the idea that you could speak to a peer about it and have a little more relatability.” Vanessa found this work extremely rewarding and truly enjoyed helping her peers through their everyday challenges, big and small. “My favorite part of it was actually seeing people come back to our services and use the space to talk about their strengths and their triumphs,” she shared. “I have a special place in my heart for the kind of experiences where people feel like they're on their own little island and it doesn't have to be that way.”

In 2015, Vanessa enrolled in the clinical psychology master’s program at Notre Dame de Namur University in Belmont, California. While studying cognitive science at UC Merced, Vanessa had developed an interest in psychology and she entered this program with the goal of determining whether a career in psychology was right for her. “I met some really wonderful people who are very passionate about what they do and everything clicked,” she recalled. “Every single class was fascinating to me and being surrounded by people with very similar interests, and maybe even similar goals to an extent, was very inspiring and motivating.” During this program, Vanessa also had her first practicum experience, working with at-risk children ages two through five. Although this was admittedly not her first choice for a placement, Vanessa is now extremely grateful to have worked with young children during her first clinical experience. “It has actually informed all of my clinical experiences since then, especially my work with forensic populations, just remembering these people were children once and I've worked with children who came from similar backgrounds,” she explained. “And that changes the way I think and hold these people in my mind and I think that's a really important part of the work.”

From 2015-2022, Vanessa worked at UserTesting, Inc., a company that designs, executes, and analyzes studies to provide companies with customer feedback on their products and services. She began as a UX (User Experience) Researcher, then moved on to the role of Onboarding Specialist, and finally UX Research Consultant. “One of the skills I developed was being able to listen to the questions that aren't being explicitly asked, or the things that aren't being explicitly said,” she reflected. “I think that applies now to my clinical work and it refined my ear to listen for the things that aren't being explicitly said, which has been really helpful.” This experience taught Vanessa how to dig deeper with her clients and really analyze what they’re trying to communicate.

Vanessa enrolled in the Wright Institute’s Clinical Psychology program in the fall of 2020. “I realized there was more to learn and I really wanted to be able to have a little bit more autonomy and flexibility to work in different kinds of settings,” she explained. “I was really interested in working with individuals who are involved in our forensic system and I felt like I needed more education and more training to provide ethical care for those kinds of populations.” Vanessa was drawn to the Wright Institute because of its small size, location, and the mission to educate clinicians to society. “It was important for me to be housed in an institution that connected everything we were learning to what it would look like in the real world, in our own practice, with our own patients,” she reflected.

During her first two years at the Wright Institute, Vanessa worked as a trainee at the Wright Institute’s Recovery Clinic and then the Psychodynamic Clinic. “When I first started working with these populations, especially at the Recovery Clinic, my initial perception as a very green clinician was that these people had been through so much and I needed to hold their hands because they were delicate,” she admitted. “I learned very quickly that that is not the case - these people are strong, these people are resilient.” Vanessa carries this early lesson with her in all of her work today. At the Psychodynamic Clinic, she was excited to work with couples and clients of more varied ages. A big thing that she took away from her work at the Psychodynamic Clinic was their clinic’s slogan: “everything is grist for the mill,” meaning everything has clinical significance in some way.

In her third year, Vanessa’s placement was at Salinas Valley State Prison’s Psychiatric Inpatient Program. She described her work there as very heavy and difficult, but also very meaningful and fulfilling. “The most challenging parts were working with the limitations of the institution and also with different professionals who had varying opinions of how we should be caring for these patients,” she explained. “There are so many different ways that you can approach the same conflict or the same individual and the more you learn, the more you realize that there's so much more to learn.” In this role, Vanessa felt like she had to stand up for what she believed was right for her patients and she’s so grateful for that push. “I grew a lot in my ability to advocate for my patients and I had to trust my values as an individual and as a clinician,” she reflected. “Finding my sense of confidence and knowing that my experiences have value has been really helpful.”

Vanessa’s doctoral dissertation, titled “Incarceration, Reentry, and Recidivism Through the Lens of Neurodivergent Racial Minorities,” was inspired by her work at Salinas Valley State Prison and her own lived experiences watching misunderstood members of her community be placed in jail. “It can be challenging to have both this priority of safety while also considering the long term implications of putting someone in jail when they actually really need mental healthcare,” she shared. “I think that I found myself drawn to thinking about individuals who have these additional challenges associated with their diagnoses, how they advocate for themselves, and what their experiences are like.” Overall, she hopes to see more psychologists becoming involved in policing to better support communities.

Last year, Vanessa worked at San Francisco Veterans Affairs Medical Center as an Addiction Research Practicum Trainee. Although working with individuals in the recovery process wasn’t new to Vanessa, the constraints of this program were. “It was very quick and a lot more tactical in the sense that we were working with a set curriculum,” she recalled. “It was a helpful exercise in taking this very big, amorphous human experience and containing it to work within the span of eight weeks.” Despite the tight time constraints, Vanessa found that you can do “surprisingly profound work” with people who are motivated to do the work.

Vanessa began a very competitive and prestigious internship at Harvard Medical School this July. During her internship, Vanessa will be working as part of two different teams: the rapid access to flexible treatment (RAFT) team and the mental illness and problematic sexual behavior (MIPS) team. Many of her patients live in group homes or are unhoused and are being served by a network of community programs and organizations. “I'm really starting to understand how all of these various resources work together to provide what hopefully feels like continuity of care,” she shared. “This is my first opportunity to have pre-established relationships with all of these different organizations and professionals to provide the best care possible and that feels so impactful just to start dipping my toes into that work.” Although she’s still in the early stages of her internship, Vanessa already feels like she’s finding her footing. “Something that I've appreciated so far about this experience is that I already feel very valued as an equal on my team in terms of my experience and my opinion,” she reflected. “There is a lot to learn, but I'm excited to do this work and I'm re-energized every time I get to be in a group or meet with one of my patients.”

There are a few professors who have had a profound impact on Vanessa during her time at the Wright Institute. She appreciated the wisdom and realism of her Case Conference leader, Dr. Allison Briscoe-Smith, who guided her through her first two years in the program. Vanessa also loved her courses with Dr. Emily Diamond, who taught her Research Methods and Statistics I & II and Tests and Measurement courses. “Her approach to teaching is so kind and openly compassionate and also so knowledgeable, but not in an intimidating way,” she explained. “She healed a lot of my trauma from other instructors in my past education.” Finally, Vanessa was very inspired by Dr. Eric Freitag, who taught her neuropsychology courses. “He is a certified EMT and talked a lot about how that has helped him think about the work from a more well-rounded perspective,” she shared. “Two years ago, I also became an EMT and have been doing that on nights and weekends and it was very much due to his influence.” Finally, Vanessa is thankful for her dissertation chair, Dr. Daniela Kantorová, whose passion for her work is infectious.

Looking back on her time at the Wright Institute thus far, Vanessa’s happiest memories involve spending time with her members of her cohort. “I’m not sure about other cohorts, but for my cohort, there is a kind, compassionate camaraderie and we’re very collaborative,” she explained. “I feel very lucky to have that kind of professional relationship with these individuals, where I know I can reach out if I have a question and also to have personal relationships with them outside of school.” Perhaps it’s related to the fact that they began their courses remotely in the fall of 2020, but whether they’re working on their dissertations or just blowing off steam, members of her cohort are there to support one another. Vanessa described her cohort-mates as “some of the kindest, smartest folks” she’s ever had the opportunity to work with.

One of Vanessa’s greatest joys is giving back to the communities and organizations that supported her along her journey. “One of the experiences that really shaped me when I was growing up was dance,” she reflected. “I always go back to my dance studio and talk to them about the meaning that I discovered in it and the importance of what they're doing.” In recent years, Vanessa has volunteered as an Alumni Mentor at UC Merced through their Bobcats Helping Bobcats program and through the Pilipino Americans in Science & Engineering (PASE) group. Many members of the PASE group are experiencing parental pressure to follow a particular career path, which Vanessa can relate to from her own upbringing. “Your path doesn't have to be a pin-straight line, it can be a curvy loop-the-loop,” she reminds them. “And that is perfectly okay - it's not a race.”

When she’s not otherwise occupied with school, work, or volunteering, Vanessa enjoys slow-paced, relaxing hobbies. “I basically turn into a grandma in my free time,” she laughed. “I love reading, crocheting, and gardening.” She also enjoys spending time with her family. As she heads into her first Boston winter, Vanessa has already started crocheting a few hats to keep herself warm.

Vanessa is exploring a variety of pathways for her career after graduating from the Wright Institute. As a first step, she hopes to work in a state prison or state hospital, but down the road, she is interested in getting experience working with active duty military members and first responders. “A lot of folks ask if I feel discouraged because of my experiences seeing the challenges and limitations of working in an institution and my response has always been no,” she explained. “Seeing what they're going through actually makes me want to do the work more because I recognize that there's a need for a different kind of care, a different perspective, and if I can just be like that one difference, that's what I want to do.”